Tuesday, August 30, 2016

T-minus 425.834 Days and Counting

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I wish I had a dollar for every time the sentiment that fear is the greatest obstacle to change or to living the life you want has popped up in a book I'm reading or in a meme on Facebook or has been uttered in a conference workshop or keynote address.

I'm fairly certain I read one variation or another at least 100 times as I devoured just one book -- Chicken Soup for the Soul's Reboot Your Life!

As I've read and listened, I've been . . .

encouraged by "I did this and so can you"

cautioned by "time is fleeting, life is short, regrets are ugly things"

and even bullied by "if you really trust God, you'll take the leap and trust                Him to catch you."

Through it all, I've vacillated on the continuum of uncertainty.

Sometimes, I'm somewhat certain I can make the monumental vocational leap I dream of. Equally often, I'm pretty certain that doing so would be a huge misstep . . . or mis-leap.

Never, though, have I felt confident I can do it, that I can walk away from the thing I once loved but that has changed so drastically I hardly recognize it to do what I've dreamed almost my entire life of doing.

I know what's holding me back, what fears keep me continuing down the path I'm already on.

I simply haven't been able to overcome those fears.

For years, I've read or heard countless testimonies of people who finally pushed through their fear by burning bridges. There was the unhappy ad executive who walked into his boss' office one day and gave his 6-month notice and the couple that put everything they needed and used in one room of their house, invited homeless people into their home to take whatever they wanted for free, and then downsized to a tiny house they built with their own  two hands.

I chuckled at the story of the woman with 6 sizes of full sets of clothing to fall back on when her latest diet failed. She boxed up all but the smallest size and drove 4 hours to drop off the boxes of at a resale shop that raises money for a battered-women and children's shelter. She said she considered a town only 2 hours away but was fairly certain a 2-hour drive wasn't enough to make her overcome the urge to go back and re-buy all her clothes. She was pretty confident that a 4-hour drive each way would do the trick.

Two weeks ago, I decided to burn a bridge.

I did it the very next day.

Only two people -- my son and my daughter -- are aware that there was a bridge burning the afternoon of August 19.

Truth be told, the bridge is burned, but there's a rowboat on the shore I can use in a pinch. But I'm trying really hard to forget that rowboat exists, to remember that there's a way to circumvent that burned-out bridge.

And so, the bridge has been burned, and I'm ignoring the row boat. How much time do I have to prepare for the actual leap?

14 months.

425.834 days.

Here we go!

 

 

9 comments:

  1. I am really curious what change you're wanting to make, but I pray that God guides you into great adventures. Fear and worry can keep us from taking flight, but we don't have to fly alone. We can fly on His promises and power. I hope to hear how the adventure goes! You've got a while till the change happens...

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  2. I once gave a 90 day notice to a job I could have loved if management had understood how over worked we were. The 90 days was to finish up my contracts to the point that turning them over to someone else would not have added stress on them, something that I did not have the luxury of when I arrived. The 12 contracts I was told I would have to administer was actually 145 that had been neglected for months.

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  3. Faith is risky, but if we don't act on it we won't grow up in Christ. Not knowing what your bridge is, I can still identify. I will be taking a leap of faith soon and although I'm so excited, I'm also a little fearful as to how much I will miss something that has been a part of my life for over 30 years. But, I must move forward and ignore the row-boat. Thank you for sharing. Blessings!

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  4. I'm like Katy ... I really want to know what's on the other shore ;-) One of the many things I love about the Lord is that I've learned He is always in the difficult place or the new place or the place of our tomorrows long before we get there. He's just waiting on you to arrive.

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  5. Thank you for your support and prayers, Katy. I'll definitely post updates here on the blog. :)

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  6. Oh my -- 145 instead of 12 -- I can't even begin to imagine your shock! Management is a huge issue in my job as well. It seems when people move up, they forget what it was like where they were. I hope your new position is much better, Cindi

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  7. Melanie, thank you for sharing. I've subscribed to your blog and will be cheering you on as you take your own leap of faith. :)

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  8. Looking forward to hearing more about your journey and your leap of faith.

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  9. Thank you for visiting, Leigh. I'll post updates as I move forward.

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