I'm very excited to again this week join a talented group of women who connect each Friday in an online, unedited flash mob free write based on a one-word prompt from our fearless leader Kate Motaung. My timer is set for 5 minutes; let's see where the word "worth" takes me.
Almost every week, as soon as I read the current week's focus word, my thoughts go to its religious application.
For example, this week I began mentally writing my post as I was setting the timer and logging on to blogger:
The only thing I remember from the one econ class I took in college is that a product's worth is, in and of itself, nothing, nada, zilch. It doesn't matter how much money was spent in research and development or in the manufacture of the product or even in the usefulness of a product. It's worth -- any item's worth -- is only determined by what someone is willing to pay for it.
If you're a Christian or have spent any time around Christians, I'm sure you know where my thoughts were headed.
That in and of ourselves, we humans have no value. Yet paradoxically, we are of the utmost value because God sent His Son to redeem us and because in turn, Jesus gave His life for us.
And that is true.
With my "add post" page on the screen, my timer set, and a glass of iced sweet tea on the table next to me, I started to type.
I didn't get very far. Only 2 words. I simply didn't want to go in that direction. I turned off the timer and sat for awhile, sipping my tea, listening to the birds at the feeder just outside my open window, and considering what was stopping me from churning out this really-easy-to-write post.
When the answer came to me, I almost decided not to write this week. I didn't want what I wanted to say to be construed as a hand slap of the talented and very sincere writers who may take the approach I'd first considered. I didn't want to diminish the very real truth that our worth is determined by God and the price He and His son paid for me.
But at the same time, I simply could not bring myself to focus on that.
I don't have many readers. I know that, and while I love to write (true) and would write even if not a single person were to read it (also true), that I could also say I don't care whether I have not a single reader or a thousand (not true). But that's a post for another day. :)
And so, I always hope that something I write is going to attract a larger-than-ever audience.
And if that happens this week, if even one non-Five Minute Friday person stumbles across this post, if even one person who is struggling and who finds platitudes -- true or not, Christian or not -- to be just one more source of frustration because they seem so pat, so perfect, so everything for everyone . . . else, I want to offer them not platitudes, but encouragement.
So here it is. Our true and eternal worth is dependent on how God viewed and continues to view us.
But, right or wrong, it's also determined every day on what we think of ourselves . . . based what we can accomplish, on our life-roles and how well we play them, and on (let's face it) what others think of us.
I would argue that right or wrong, all of us -- even those who are 1000% rooted in their faith -- feel this way at one time or another, for varying lengths of time.
So here's my thought on our worth, the type of worth we place on ourselves.
Sometimes we're going to feel pretty happy with ourselves and see ourselves as very worthy. We need celebrate those moments, revel in them without becoming arrogant, and hide those moments in our heart. We're going to need them.
Because sometimes we're not going to feel very worthy. When that happens, we need to acknowledge that, find ways to cope with it, and if a mistake can be fixed or a wrong rectified, take care of it.
And then . . . move on. Quickly, without wallowing.
Forgive ourselves, remind ourselves that we often get it right, and move on.
That's what I think . . . for what it's worth.